


saying the words

by lalaland666 (orphan_account)



Category: Good Omens (TV)
Genre: Autistic Aziraphale (Good Omens), Awake the Snake (Good Omens), Crowley Has ADHD (Good Omens), Fluff, I promise this is soft, Love Confessions, M/M, Past Abuse, Post-Episode: Good Omens: Lockdown, Recovery, i cannot believe that “awake the snake” is a canon tag, not the focus but he does, technically but like they both knew
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-18
Updated: 2020-07-18
Packaged: 2021-03-05 03:33:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,311
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25367656
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/lalaland666
Summary: Aziraphale calls Crowley just after he’s woken up, and they talk. No barriers, no rules.(In which Aziraphale is getting better at existing without the influence of Heaven, and Crowley doesn’t mind waiting just a little bit longer.)
Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)
Comments: 26
Kudos: 166





	saying the words

**Author's Note:**

> no i don’t know what this is either. yes i know i’m 17 days late for awake the snake. no i don’t care. this exists bc bad takes in fandom have been driving me crazy lately and i wanted to write something soft and self-indulgent. as usual with my one-shots, this was written in like 3 hours and not beta-read at all, so please be gentle, and thanks for reading!!

“Hey, angel.” 

“Crowley! My dear, how are you?” 

“Still half asleep. Everything okay?” 

“Oh, yes! Yes, things are… well, about as well as could be expected, with the way this year is going.” 

“Ah. So things haven’t gotten better the last two months?” 

“I’m afraid not. Have you not seen the news?” 

“Nah, I just got up about an hour ago, and I wanted a bit of time free of it all. Ignorance is bliss, an’ all that.” 

“My dear, you cannot possibly convince me that you have ever believed in that particular sentiment.” 

“Heh. Fair point. So, enlighten me, then. How’ve things been in the world? Any sign of this virus nonsense clearing up yet?” 

“Ah, well. Things are looking up a bit, on that front, which is quite good news. It hasn’t– hasn’t _stopped_ , but the curve is certainly on the downswing, and the humans are beginning to lift their restrictions bit by bit.” 

“Are they?” 

“Yes, and a-as a matter of fact, I, ah… well. There are some– some new rules in place, ones that state that– well, if two people were to each consent to be part of one another’s, ah, _social bubbles_ , as it were… those people would be permitted to… to largely proceed as before, around one another, at least insofar as things like, like visits and mask-wearing in private are concerned.” 

“Really? Fascinating.” 

“Isn’t it? And, well, I was– I was rather hoping that perhaps, you and I could– ah–” 

“Be in a social bubble?” 

“Precisely!” 

“Hm. Well, I suppose it depends, then. Who else is in your _bubble_?” 

“O-oh. Well, um. I. I haven’t actually… you know, I was– was hoping that I could ask you, and these things are– are closed, you know, there isn’t meant to be any real overlap between them, and you– well, there really isn’t anyone else I’d ask, if I’m being entirely honest, so…” 

“ _Oh_. Right. Mng. I, er, I get it. Yes, I’ll do the social bubble thing with you. More than happy to.” 

“Oh, really? How wonderful! I, ah, I know you’ve just woken up, and I’m sure there’s quite a lot of catching up for you to do, but I was wondering if perhaps, now that we are a ‘bubble’, so to speak, would you like to… well, I did taper off on the baking eventually, but there are still some sweets here, and I… would you perhaps… like to drop by for a little bit?” 

“I can be over there in a couple minutes with a case of something. Any preferences?” 

“Not at all, so long as you’ll drink it with me.” 

“Right. Should I bring something to pair with the desserts?” 

“Oh, that would be lovely! You know, though, I’m not– not particular, at the moment, so long as– well, it’s just, I know that it really hasn’t been very long at all in the grand scheme of things, but– it, it has been rather… you know I’ve never much minded solitude, not really, and I still don’t, but… well…” 

“I missed you, too, angel.” 

“Ahh. Right. Yes. I, um. I suppose I’ll– I’ll see you soon, then?” 

“See you in five.” 

“Crowley, it is a ten minute drive–!” 

There was the soft click of a telephone hanging up, and then the drone of the dial tone. Aziraphale set his own telephone back on the receiver, shaking his head fondly at it before glancing around the shop. He’d tidied up a bit earlier, starting at around midnight, now that it was finally July and Crowley might be awake. Eventually, the wait had gotten to him, and he’d phoned first, and now was ever so glad that he had. And Crowley had said yes–! 

It wasn’t that… that Aziraphale had _expected_ Crowley to say no, exactly. It was more that he hadn’t quite let himself expect anything in particular, in either direction. Of course, Crowley had been nothing but good and kind and ever so accommodating, ever since they’d returned from the Ritz that first day for a nightcap, and (after several drinks) Aziraphale had, with a trembling voice and bitten-back tears, asked Crowley if he would terribly mind waiting for him for just a little longer. And then Crowley had taken his hands, and smiled at him so very kindly, and promised that their side had no expectations, no rules, and he would wait another thousand years if that was what Aziraphale needed, and… 

Aziraphale knew that Crowley was being sincere. It had been hard to mistake the look on his face, even for someone as with as little skill in such things as Aziraphale had. And he had always kept his word, at least as far as Aziraphale was concerned. But still, the angel couldn’t help but worry, just a little. Not that Crowley would leave him behind– he hadn’t yet, even after more than six thousand years of dithering and fretting and all that other nervous nonsense that Aziraphale was so very prone to, and he was unlikely to do so any time soon– but that, perhaps, it might have been better for Crowley if… 

_No_ , he scolded himself sharply, accompanying the thought with a firm shake of his head. _That is Heaven talking, and you know it._ He and Crowley had talked about that, about the way that six thousand years Up Above and Down Below could cloud one’s thoughts, before the lockdown had hit. It wasn’t… wasn’t always _easy_ , and it certainly wasn’t intuitive, but… he’d been trying. Doing his best. 

It had been... rather difficult, at times, being alone as he had been the past few months. Before Crowley had gone to sleep, he and Aziraphale had telephoned fairly regularly, and of course before the lockdown, they had seen one another nearly every day. It had been... an adjustment, having to be on his own once more, without even the work and reports and backhanded nonsense from Heaven to occupy him. Aziraphale was wildly glad that Crowley was awake again, and it only somewhat terrified him to admit it. 

There was a sudden, loud knock from the direction of the bookshop’s front door, and Aziraphale startled, jerked out of his thoughts by the sound. He hurried over to the door and pulled it open at once, revealing Crowley standing outside, wearing a black mask with a red trim and straps and carrying the promised case of wine half on his hip. His hair had gotten longer since Aziraphale had last seen him– which, of course, made sense, as Crowley was in the habit of letting his hair grow in the human manner– and behind him, the Bentley had resumed her customary and illegal spot halfway up on the kerb. 

“Crowley!” Aziraphale said, feeling his entire body light up at the sight of the demon, and he had to resist the sudden urge to throw his arms around him. “Do come in, my dear, and let me take that.” 

Crowley handed him the case without complaint, following him inside, and Aziraphale could hear the smile in his voice when he spoke. “Hey, angel. It’s good to see you.” 

“That it is,” Aziraphale said, miracling the wine into its appropriate place (most of the case downstairs into the wine cellar which only sort of existed in this realm, and one bottle open and aerating on the coffee table in the back room) before turning to face Crowley once more, entirely unable and quite frankly unwilling to hold back his beaming smile at the sight of him. “I’m afraid I didn’t ask over the telephone, how was your nap?” 

“It was alright,” Crowley said, shrugging faintly and tugging his mask off. It promptly vanished from between Crowley’s fingers, and Aziraphale hadn’t the faintest idea where it’d got to. “I mean, I was asleep, so… not much to report. You, on the other hand! How’re the humans mucking things up now?” 

And with that, Crowley held out his hand, his head tilted ever so slightly. An offer. A question. _Where is the line today? What are you okay with?_

Aziraphale took his hand in answer, and Crowley’s grin shone brighter than the sun had in all of June as they made their way into the back room. 

The wine was spectacular, which was to be expected– after all, Crowley had picked it– and the dark chocolate and raspberry macarons were infinitely better than his first batch, which had left a cloud of smoke in the flat upstairs for three days afterwards, a feat made all the more impressive by the fact that they never made it to the oven. 

Aziraphale and Crowley talked, just talked, much as they always had, but without the threat of Heaven and Hell looming over their heads, without the threat of work and deadlines and those who considered themselves above (or, in Crowley’s case, below) their Earth-bound minions and the humans that surrounded them. _With_ the occasional brush of fingers, the gentle grip of a hand on an arm or a wrist or another hand, gripping in laughter and joy, with Crowley’s glasses discarded on the coffee table, and Aziraphale sat closer than he had ever dared before Armageddon, and the air between them lighter than it had been in millennia. 

“Oh, I missed this while you were asleep,” Aziraphale said eventually, cradling his glass in his hands and leaning back into the plush of the sofa. “It wasn’t so very long in the grand scheme of things, of course, and I do know how much you enjoy your sleep, dear, I should hate to tell you what to do, but I think I might go mad if you decided to sleep for a century again.” 

“Ahhh, don’t need to worry ‘bout that,” Crowley said, waving his hand as though to bat the idea away. “Not got any reason to sleep so long anymore. ‘N I’d miss you too much, too.” 

Aziraphale beamed at him, then tipped over, leaning half against the sofa back and half against Crowley’s side. Crowley tugged him in closer, an arm around his shoulders, and Aziraphale let out a quiet hum, closing his eyes and relaxing into the contact. 

“You’re so much touchier when you’re drunk,” Crowley said after a long moment, a hand rubbing up and down Aziraphale’s arm. 

“I’m not drunk,” Aziraphale protested, though there wasn’t much heat behind it. “And, well. It’s harder to be afraid of much when you’re a bottle and a half deep.” 

“Still?” Crowley asked. 

Aziraphale sighed. “It… they… it was six thousand and twenty-three years, Crowley. I… it won’t…” 

“Not gonna go away in a year,” Crowley said, nodding. “Makes sense.” 

“Has it, for you?” Aziraphale asked quietly. “Has it gotten better?” 

“ _Better_ , yeah,” Crowley said quietly. “But… well. Still liable to panic if you light up a candle down here.” 

“Well, you don’t have to worry about that.” He let out a faint sigh, letting his head fall onto Crowley’s shoulder. “Are you alright, dear?” 

“I am now,” Crowley said, squeezing Aziraphale’s shoulders gently. “You?” 

“I will be.” 

Crowley hummed softly, and then they lapses into silence. Aziraphale listened to Crowley’s breathing, felt the rise and fall of his chest. He remembered when they had first learned to breathe, in order to fit in with humanity. They’d done it together– Aziraphale had asked the other angels, and been very nearly laughed back down to Earth. Crowley hadn’t bothered. They had spent three days together in the hut that Crowley had found, on the edge of the settlement that they’d joined, and practiced until their breathing was convincing enough that the humans couldn’t tell them apart. 

It had become second nature, after so very long. Instinctive. Necessary, in its own way. Aziraphale had trouble now, holding his breath, and he knew that Crowley was the same. 

So far as Aziraphale knew, none of the others in Heaven and Hell had ever bothered with such basic human things as breathing. It was just him and Crowley, alone in this as they were in so many other things. Alone with one another, like they always were, always had been and always would be. 

“Thank you,” Aziraphale breathed eventually. 

“Hm? What for?” Crowley asked, shifting slightly in order to look at Aziraphale a little more clearly. 

“Being ever so patient with me,” Aziraphale said. “I know I haven’t always been… but you’ve always been so… so good to me. It means more than I could ever hope to say.” 

“Said it before, I’ll say it again,” Crowley said, shifting once again so his head was resting on top of Aziraphale’s. “You’re worth all the goodness and patience I’ve got. ‘Sides, I should be thanking you. Always here for me. Steady. Not sure I’d be who I am if you hadn’t been here the whole time, being who you are through it all.” 

“Oh,” Aziraphale breathed, and then… they hadn’t said it yet, not out loud, not in words, and he should, by all rights, have been terrified to do so, and yet… here, in Crowley’s arms, warm with good wine and decent food and incomparable company, it was perhaps the easiest thing he’d ever done. “Crowley, I love you.” 

He wasn’t sure what he’d expected, exactly, but he did know that none of it happened. Instead, Crowley just turned his head, pressing his smile into Aziraphale’s hair, and said simply, “Love you, too, angel.” 

Something warm and light and indescribably happy blossomed in Aziraphale’s chest, and he pressed closer to Crowley, winding his arms around the demon’s waist. Love. Aziraphale loved Crowley, and had done for as long as he could remember. And Crowley loved him back, openly, proudly, even after all this time. And here, together, amongst the humans, his books, wrapped as he was in Crowley’s arms… 

Aziraphale was happier than he’d ever been.

**Author's Note:**

> i hope you guys liked it!! if you comment and i don’t respond, i’m sorry, but know that i love and appreciate every one of you. thanks for reading!!!


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